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Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): The Tapping Solution

by Lane Gormley, LPC

The following is a synopsis of a healing technique that I learned in a class with Jondi Whitis, AAMET Master Trainer of Trainers.  Her website is www.eft4results.com.

EFT (often called “Tapping”)

Some of my Clients report that they cannot stop ruminating. They go over and over a problem in their brains continually and never reach a comfortable outcome that will satisfy them and allow them to sleep through the night.  Others report that they are run ragged by emotions that they cannot think through.  Still others feel divorced from their bodies and the amazing wisdom they contain.  By bringing different aspects of ourselves to a problem or situation, we can better process the major discomfort “out” of our system.

As I understand it, EFT can allow a person to align brain, physical body, and emotions to process various types of discomfort ranging from depression and anxiety to runaway emotions to phobias to physical pain.  It is also said to be of help in many non-clinical endeavors such as sports performance and public speaking.

Just Do This

  1. Create a brief Balancing Statement about the problem you are having. Example: “Even though I am very worried about giving a speech tomorrow, I accept my feelings as being understandable.”  The statement must be about you and not about someone else, although you can process your own feelings about others. Ideally, it should also be true.  Don’t say you accept your feelings as understandable if you do not.  Perhaps you could say, instead, “…this is just how I feel right now.”
  2. Rate the problem in terms of its intensity, or effect on you, on a scale of 0 to 10.
  3. Tap on the “Karate Chop” side of one of your hands while making your statement as clear as you can, changing it in any way you like. Mention the Intensity Rating you have given it.  Even though I am worried/fearful/anxious about the speech tomorrow and it’s about a 6 in intensity, this is just how I’m feeling right now.  Continuing to tap on the Karate Chop side of your hand, repeat the Balancing Statement about three times, including the intensity rating you feel after each time.  The intensity rating might go up at first and then, maybe, start to lower.
  4. Now, tap on each of the acupoints (acupressure/acupuncture points) six or eight times while referring to the issue: …this fear, this uncomfortable fear that is at a 6, this fear of the speech tomorrow…  After cycling through the acupoints, stop and take a deep breath.  Check in with yourself and see if the fear might be at a lesser level.  Go through this cycle two or three times.  Give yourself a chance to see that you can calm and help yourself.

Save Anything That Comes Up

During tapping, other issues may emerge (i.e., while tapping, the fear of the speech may be revealed or clarified to be fear of not being perfect, fear of colleagues, fear of people, or fear of life itself.  Or maybe it’s just nervous tension or fatigue.  Write down any ideas or feelings that come up, and you can tap about them later.  Tapping can be a goldmine of information about you.

Questions?  Come see me!!!




Practicing Therapy, Practicing Yoga

By Lane Gormley, EdS, LPC, NCC

image source: www.bombayroomyoga.com/what-is-yoga

image source: www.bombayroomyoga.com/what-is-yoga

The Practice of Therapy

You are already engaged, or are thinking about engaging, in a practice called therapy.  I am impressed and touched by your willingness to do this most difficult thing – to look within yourself in a conscious attempt to face and to release pain.  I never asked you and would never ask you to do it.  It is too difficult.  I am grateful, though, for your courage, transparency, patience, honesty, and humor.  Sitting with you enables me to engage in one of my own practices, that of the clinical therapist.  Being your therapist is not simply my profession.  It is my purpose and, of course, my challenge.  You interest and exhaust me, make me laugh, try my patience, and push buttons I didn’t know I had.  You are my truest teachers, and I have great reverence for you and for your practice.

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“More Focused, More Clear”: A Client’s Therapy Notes

(Image Source: www.clayhound.us)

(Image Source: www.clayhound.us)

Written By Lane Gormley, EdS, LPC, NCC

Directed by Thought
Thoughts are key agents in our human process. They channel our energy toward the creation of what we want… or its opposite. Being mindful involves, in part, knowing what our thoughts are and learning to guide them gently in the right direction. Clients who had a challenging background – trauma survivors, those who are working through depression, people whose anxiety or grief is overwhelming – can often heal if they know how powerful their thoughts are. Rather than denying our difficult thoughts or repressing them, we can learn to allow and release them. If we work at it, we can learn to understand, honor, and ease thoughts of sadness and to replace them with thoughts of our own conscious choice.

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What Does a Man Want?

Written by Lane Gormley, EdS, LPC, NCC

Image source: http://ijocendolll.blogspot.com/2013/04/8tips-on-how-to-improve-your-image-for.html

Image source: http://bit.ly/1jTSyBy

The Question Itself
It is an interesting question to many people for many different reasons. It is of interest to me because I am a therapist to numerous men. Don’t ask me why. I have no clue. I just am. Everyone is surprised by it. My friends never tire of making fun of me for being a specialist in “Men’s Issues”.

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It’s All About You: The Power of Narrative Therapy

Written by Lane Gormley, EdS, LPC, BCC, NGHC

One of my friends is a remarkable, prolific, and famous writer.  Another close friend said of her, “What is so wonderful about Leah [not her real name] is that she is never going to need a therapist.  She just writes it all down… and puts it out there… and then publishes it as a play or novel.”

A Dark and Stormy Night

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Setting Boundaries: Clearing a Space for Healing and Personal Growth

Written by Lane Gormley, EdS, LPC, NCC

Do you frequently imagine that other people are the problem? If you do, you may need to become more centered in your own life and in your own process in order to find joy. While working on inpatient psychiatric and addiction units, I began to notice how many of our Patients alluded to problems ’caused by’ others. When I went into private practice, I was even more aware of how often the session focused on someone who was not in the room and yet whose behaviors were having a tremendous impact on my Client. Here are some examples:

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